On Tuesday I was lucky to get within 18 inches 45 centimeters of my Number One Icon Madonna. Never mind that I had already seen her Sticky and Sweet tour four times in New York City last year; this time I was seeing her in Israel, and I had (cue the Angelic music) a Golden Circle ticket.
You dropped 1,500 sheks on a show you’d already seen four times???
Why yes, I did, and then I also went again (cheap seats) the next night. Look, Madonna is my favorite artist and performer of all time. I consider seeing her perform live an excellent way to spend my time; it’s electric, playful, theatrical – why wouldn’t I want to repeat that experience as often as possible??? Hmm, let me think…put this into some Jewish equivalent…OK, I got it: Let’s say you were invited for Shabbat Dinner at some friends’ place, and they were amazing cooks. In fact, they served maybe the best meal you’d ever tasted. Plus, their company was delightful – he was hilarious, she was fascinating, they were both gorgeous, and their apartment was something out of a magazine. If you were lucky enough to score an invitation to their place again, would you decline just because you had that experience once already? Probably not. You’d probably make a big Homer Simpson Woo-Hoo! noise and put on your Fat Pants. Am I making sense now?
I’ve seen Madonna perform twelve times among all her tours before, but I’d never sprung for the Golden Circle (again, pause for Angelic music) ticket before. I usually pay for the second best level of seats, but can’t seem to bring myself to drop the maximum amount for the Best Seats, since it’s usually double the dough. But Madonna herself sings in “Express Yourself” – Don’t go for second best, baby. Put your love to the test. This time, I took advantage of my Legacy Membership in her ICON fan club (pause, until you stop laughing), and paid Top Dollar.
First let me say, this was the easiest commute I ever had to a concert. There was no backed up expressway traffic vying for the same exit or long lines for parking. Since Madonna was performing in Hayarkon Park, I could ride my bicycle there. Even better, I didn’t have to ride my bicycle through city streets with traffic or crowded sidewalks dodging people or have to stop at any traffic lights. I got to ride the same trail I jog regularly, part of the same route I ran in the Tel Aviv Marathon – something totally familiar and private and personal to me, something mine. I rode my bicycle with no hands in solitude. It was a magical, meditative start to the night.
I was wearing a muscle shirt I got from 2004’s Re-Invention Tour. It has Madonna’s name in Hebrew on it. Most Israelis wouldn’t have this shirt unless they are jet-setters or lived in the U.S. at that time, b/c Madge hasn’t performed here since 1993. I went through the Golden Circle entrance and claimed my spot right in front of the the end of the catwalk. Even though the little people regular ticket holders were fenced off from we Golden Circle Chosen Ones, our tickets were still general admission within the circle. Meaning – even though Madonna never takes the stage before 9:30 p.m. and it was only 6:30 p.m. when I arrived, if I didn’t stake my spot now (and defend it, as needed), I’d never be as close to her come Showtime as I wanted to be. It was still hot out, but I didn’t bring anything to drink with me, because I didn’t want to have to pee; if you left for the bathroom, you could kiss your prime spot goodbye, and nobody likes a full bladder. I had only chewing gum to keep my mouth moist.
I wound up next to a nice trio of delightful young Israelis. We got along well, and I gave them only as many concert spoilers as they asked for. Before and throughout the concert, the crowd was surprisingly well behaved. I say surprisingly because of the stereotype of the “pushy Israeli,” the ones you hear stalk the supermarket and bus stop. But not Madonna’s Israeli fans – we were largely well-mannered. Except for the obnoxious woman who sneaked past us and wound up splitting our little group into two halves, constantly yelling to her girlfriend on the other side of us. (Hey, I was distracted taking a picture when she made her move!) Plus, she was wearing a backpack, which was pushing against me. It was interesting to see what happened next. There was complaining amongst ourselves, then something was said to her. She argued back and stood her (stolen) ground, but we did succeed in having her remove her backpack. All in all, not enough to damper my sky-high spirits.
The Queen did not disappoint. The show was revamped slightly since 2008, and I especially enjoyed the new numbers she added. My heart touched the sky the two times she looked in my direction. I got up on my tippy-toes and ran my hand across her Hebrew name on my shirt, conveying my adoration. The second of those times she noticed and smiled directly at me. *Stun*
Then at the show’s most intimate moment, when she sang a Spanish-tinged acoustic version of “You Must Love Me,” I did a Bit I’ve been doing since the New York shows. After she sang the line You must love me… I answered her by yelling I do! I do! I do love you, Madonna! I love you so much! I do, I do, I do! I do! Well on this special night, when I yelled that for the first time, she looked over and sang directly to me You must love me… I got farklempt and gasped and brought my hands to my chest like a little girl; she responded by smiling wider and serenading me again You must love me…
Wait, it gets even better. There was a rumor floating around that Madonna’s daughter Lourdes was going to perform for the very first time with Mummy during the tour’s last show. I wasn’t expecting it the first night, but one of my new friends spotted Lola during the last number “Give it 2 Me,” and said That’s her daughter! That’s her daughter! Of course, I thought she was saying That’s her water! That’s her water!, so I didn’t pay attention, and I missed the moment. Fortunately, I snapped a few pics of the moment anyway, because Madonna had taken a fan’s Israeli flag and draped it over herself, and I wanted a shot of this. Score! History in the making.
My bicycle did not touch the ground the whole ride home. The Hayarkon trail was lit but isolated. I basked in the quiet and rode no-hands all the way home, singing to myself – high on my night.
I returned for a different experience the next night. The Cheap Seats. Given a choice, of course I would prefer to be 45 cm from Madonna instead of 100 yards 91 meters away. But Madonna designs her shows to be spectacles enjoyed by the person in the furthest, cheapest seat, and I had the chance to appreciate these visual elements of her work. And I had the space to dance my ass off!! At that distance, amidst the sea of people who’d come to watch the Greatest Entertainer of Our Time, the atmosphere reached a rapturous climax during “Ray of Light” and “Like a Prayer,” and I enjoyed it to the max.
Both nights Madonna proclaimed Israel the “energy capital of the world,” and spoke messages of praise and peace. During the first show’s monologue, she said she always feels recharged after absorbing Israel’s energy. Thank you, Madonna, for returning the favor to Israel.