Welcome to our series of articles on the singles scene in Tel Aviv. Life, love, and lust, all wrapped up in a Middle Eastern glow and penned by the wonderful Pixi…if you’re easily offended, look away now!
It’s called ‘Hot Girl Tuesday’ – a notorious national holiday for those who are lucky enough to know about it. When the sun comes up, they come out in their hundreds – short mini skirts, tight asses, long dark hair blowing in the breeze – beautiful specimens with perfect genes. There are no words to describe the beauty of Israeli women. But there are enough words to describe how we feel about them – evil, enemy, femme fatale, dangerous……ok ok……maybe I am a bit harsh.
It just seems that the inexplicable beauty and power of the Israeli woman is increasingly making us ex-pats more obsolete by the day. How can an average chick from Melbourne, Australia possibly keep up with these freaks of nature? Sometimes I wonder if the good lord planted these women here just to make us feel bad about ourselves?
The notion of the ‘’coosit’’(street Hebrew for good looking woman) is one that permeates the Tel Aviv male psyche. The coosit is an unstoppable force, a product of every male’s sexual fantasy. She is the pinnacle of sexy and the reason why Israeli men have been reduced to a rubble of emotional bankruptcy. She dominates the flirtation landscape and the more snobbish her character, the more she conquers. This is what I find most fascinating about these women – they have the ability to attract men by being mean!
I just want to stop for a second to clear something up with the reader. This article does not refer to every Israeli woman, rather, a particular type of Israeli woman. While it may be considered an unfair generalization, I can back my thoughts up with testimonies from countless Israeli women who feel just as threatened by the coosit as I do.
The coosit has become a type of sub culture in this city. It has evolved from a look to an attitude and quite frankly, the whole coosit thing is starting to get old. When are men going to realize that a girl who responds rudely (if she responds at all) is not worth their time? Moreover, when are women going to realize that this is no way for ladies to behave?
The one thing that people don’t understand about “Hot Girl Tuesday” is that when it ends, it will be Wednesday. Come Wednesday, all the pretty girls from Tuesday will wake up without their heels and without their make-up. They will return to their regular day jobs, they will have sweaty armpits and bloated stomachs, they will be crying about the man who didn’t call back because he didn’t get what he wanted.
But Wednesday does not have to be a sad day. On the contrary, we should use this day to celebrate the thousands of normal women, you know, the ones that you didn’t give a second glance to last night because there were too many coosiyot around you. The ones that still look good without the heels and the make-up, the ones that can actually hold a decent conversation for longer than 1 minute. Wednesday should also be a day for Israeli women to step up to the plate and take a stand against the coosiyot and their reign of hotness……….
Ok I think I’m over my pseudo feminist revolution……I actually cannot wait for next ‘’Hot Girl Tuesday”. After all, it’s kind of fun to stare at a good ass……………
Next up: The Tel Aviv Untouchable